324 days ago by TinaValant | 208 views | 0 meows

Cat-astrophe?

You forward more warnings about the dangers of tinsel, grapes, onions and mistletoe than the CDC issued about anthrax and smallpox.

While garage saling, you stop at a house with a Free Kittens sign ~ to have an educational chat. Later, a friend is called to post your bail.

You have a running list of people you’d like to spay, neuter or euthanize.

Your t-shirt reads "Subtract Two Testicles For Every Four Feet."

Instead of presenting your palm for a handshake, you present your fist (thumb tucked in) under someone’s nose.

Your lunch: $1.59 hot dog and diet soda. Get home, feed cats holistic food, supplements and treats.

You not only allow pets on the couch, guests have to sit on the floor because the cat has territorial issues.

Any time your pet appears abnormal, you go online, post in the MDS Forum > Health, Advice & Vets, research more. By the time you digest all the information, the cat barfs up something (on the sofa) containing grass and is fine.  

You and your vet are on a first name basis. His nervous tic begins, as he sees you enter reception.

By the time you investigate parasite control (advantages vs risks, natural vs chemical, and study the life cycles) fleas and ticks have died of old age. 

Preparing for the holidays, you come up with a menu: eggplant parmesan, salad, and spaghetti. But your family is horrified with your invitation to Come to the Spayghetti NoBalls Holiday!